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luhluhleeroy

Leeroy
Traded in the man cave 💪🏾, for a daddy fort🥰...but they still get Papa Bear 🐻🖤

For 5 years (not every day, but a good amount of AMs), it has been early wake-ups;  putting them back to bed, or bringing them with me if it's dad-party dance time...so instead of fighting sleep, they "join me" and we have fun. ❤️
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Don't get it twisted...I am NEVER full of energy at 3:30AM, 4:00AM, 5:00AM, or 6:00AM...just chug some pre-workout, and go for it. ⚡️Endorphins from the workout, or 💙💕endorphins from Poots & Toots...either way, these are the best ways I start my days.
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Making memories while the baby cubs are cubs. 🐻💕💙🐻
This growth and my "healing" comes with a lot of r This growth and my "healing" comes with a lot of revisiting of past trauma (that I'm grateful I've been working on for quite some time now). Not for the hype from followers, not for making people pick sides, not for the clout. I, openly, and genuinely, allow others into my hards, my difficults, and my experiences...you might be the person that helps your friend and you don't even know it. 🖤
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We live in this social media bubble that what we post is our "perceived reality" ... that everyone needs to see our lives as sunshine and rainbows. For a lot of us, it's just easier to post the good stuff, because (1) it makes us happy, (2) it makes our followers/friends happy, and in turn (3) the combination of endorphins from all involved feels good...so we keep posting that way (ex. why we love cute animal videos or for me...fart videos 🤪).
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But we actively ignore the hard and sad, which is the same as bottling it up...eventually the container will get full and when it overflows, it will start to leak into the rest of your life.
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🖤 You might be the person in your friend's life that they need to hear from. Ask them if they're okay. Tell them you'd like to sit and listen if they want to talk. Affirm that you want to be a part of their life, however they need to see/feel that.
...and then, just listen. If they say nothing, just reiterate you want to be there.
🖤 When she calls me closer to ask for "huggies. 🖤 When she calls me closer to ask for "huggies." 🤍 When she asks to climb in bed to hang out for a little bit more before sleeping. 🖤 When she reaches for my hand just before crossing the street. 🤍 When she smiles so hard, her eyes diappear. 🖤 When she looks at me and those dimples appear. ❤️When she yells, "daddy!" ... pauses and finishes with, "I love you." ❤️
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If I had any advice to give to the #girldad squad out there, it's to do ALLLL the things with them, no matter how silly or "weird" it might feel. Get on the floor, play in their imagination, laugh with them, make your voice high-pitch, have your nails painted, WHATEVER it is, just do it...
...and watch an indescribable love and bond start to strengthen and continue to grow.
🤍Awwww..."chucks!" 🖤 Instead of trying to fi 🤍Awwww..."chucks!" 🖤 Instead of trying to fill my big shoes, I'm gonna teach them to fill their own shoes...make their own path, and these big-ass feet will:
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👣 Be there catch them when they fall...
👣 Stand in front of them to protect them when they need it...
👣 And be right there next to them side-by-side until they're ready...
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🖤 To blaze their own trail.
🤎🤍🖤 When they ask, "what are you?" I want 🤎🤍🖤 When they ask, "what are you?" I want you to look them in the face and say, "I am me, and I'm perfect in ALL that I am."
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I had a deep conversation yesterday about reflection and my younger self and I'm (mentally/emotionally) not ready to have that talk with my younger self, but my younger self talking to me...oooooo we ready. So here's a preview:
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🤍 Talking to my younger self:  There's a lot of guilt, sadness, and tears knowing that I needed to conform and make everyone else feel comfortable around me - so I'd allow the racist jokes, the microaggressions, and the "silence" because if everyone was "comfortable" with younger me, we could be friends. I hurt looking in the eyes of my younger self and seeing how wrong it was to conform for the happiness of others...and that I never found "me."
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🖤 But younger self talking to me now:  He would be so excited that we have 2 amazing children (a dream I knew I always wanted); that I'm standing up against the hate and making sure I can protect myself from the hate. And even better - that me now has FINALLY found my voice, is learning to truly identify who I am as a human being...and being their Papa Bear to teach his little ones self-love, confidence, and to love who they are as they are RIGHT NOW. 😭❤️ *who tha f is cutting onions??"*
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🤎 I love the 3 different shades we are...the 3 different hair styles...the scars on our bodies...the ashy knees & elbows...the me-spots (vitiligo) and each "difference" in us is an amazing thing! 👏🏾
My kids have me to teach what I wish I taught myself...and my support system will become their support too. Encourage and be there for them...TRULY be by their side and love every ounce of their adorable, energetic, loving almond/caramel fiber of their being...they will have what I wish I fought for...they will have a voice, and they will be proud, because I'm ALREADY proud. 💕Love you Poots, and Toots.💙
"One day, I will teach my children that their name "One day, I will teach my children that their name is not a playground full of letters to stumble over. I will teach them that their beauty is not contingent on pigment, but full of rich history and folk tales that breathe into the universe. I will teach them that the quieter the mouse, the more trouble he causes. They will understand that passive racism is just as uncomfortable as a silent car ride after an argument." -Renee Walker
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Jayden & Melia are my kids and they will always have me to lean on - this holds so true with the chaos around us in the world today.
As their father/dad it is my duty to protect them. to defend them. to provide for them...the duty and roles of a father that (as of recently been identified) were "taken from me" over the years. To not be allowed to take care of your own flesh and blood has now opened up the door of a history of submissiveness and "silence" to keep others "happy" so life could keep going forward.
...but no one wants to talk whole story - just what's being told (remember 3 sides to a story). Everyone wants to see the picture from a distance, but doesn't want to look at all the details that created the whole pic...why? Because the moment we throw race into the true reality of the situation, privilege, implicit biases, defensiveness, and discomfort come spewing from the mouths.
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I was the "mouse" in that quote. I conformed to please others. I let the racist jokes happen, I laughed along with them; because of that, the behaviors of others were reinforced, and never "a problem." I don't want that for my kids. I want them to confront it the second it happens and it wont be "pushed to the side" or they are asked to "forget about it." They will have a support system, stronger than the one I had in all of this.
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I need to do what's best for my children as they grow up, and of course making sure I am okay and healthy to give them ME at my best. And to protect anyone who wants to protect me and my family as well.
...if you're just seeing the picture from afar, it's time to let go, because WE deserve people who truly want to be a part of their lives, and not in it simply for the clout.
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